Friday, March 13, 2009

Reflections on a Fourth Child

I’ve had lots of time to think about the difference between having 4 children and way back when I only had one. There are a lot of differences, obviously, but I thought I’d share a few of those thoughts with all you lucky readers (all 4 of you…)

One child
:
As soon as the baby cries you run in and pick him up…and wonder why he never ‘wants’ to sleep.

Four children:
What? You hear someone crying? I don’t.

One Child:
You sit and nurse in complete silence and wonder if you’ll ever be able to do anything again.

Four Children
:
You nurse while getting snacks for the others…making lunch, dinner, breakfast…reading stories…carrying the toddler…helping the others do a ‘fun project’…

One Child:
You never get time to shower. You’re overwhelmed by how much you have to do.

Four Children
:
Need a shower? No problem! There’s even time to dry your hair, put in contacts, and apply make-up! (As long as you don’t mind the screaming fest in the other room…but that’s why you use the ear plugs provided by your local airline service…)

One Child:
You keep your baby in your room next to your bed while you’re ‘sleeping’…you can’t imagine being parted with your little one for even a moment! (And again, you wonder why the baby never sleeps)

Four Children:
All children are in their OWN rooms. I didn’t hear anyone all night long! He he he he…

One Child
:
You never get a chance to eat, as each time you start to prepare something, the baby starts crying and you assume he wants the same thing, so you sit down for another long feeding before you get to eat.

Four Children
:
I’m hungry. You can just cry. (As you’ve finally realized that the reason the baby was constantly hungry the first time is because YOU WERE TOO!!)

One Child:
You play soft music to keep the baby calm. Sometimes you sway around the living room in quiet bliss.

Four Children:
You play toddler tunes as loudly as possible and all of you run in crazy circles.

One Child:
You never ever want to have more children because it was just so much hard work and you love that little one SO MUCH that you could never love any other children as much.

Four Children
:
Maybe I could do five…or six because it’s an even number…or seven because I’ve heard it’s the ‘perfect’ number…or eight because that’s how many Devin comes from…

One Child:
DON’T YOU DARE MAKE ONE PEEP WHILE THE BABY IS NAPPING OR I’LL SHOOT YOU!

Four Children:
Oh, look, the baby fell asleep on the floor again! Let’s keep running around him in circles and giggling and see if he keeps sleeping!

One Child:
Stress every moment about whether the baby is eating the right food or getting the right amount of sleep, or whether you’re doing everything you’re ‘supposed’ to (meaning you’ve read and believe everything all those baby books tell you…), such as stimulating the baby with educational things and singing the ‘right’ songs, etc.

Four children:
You finally realize that that baby is going to get stimulated whether you do anything or not! And he won’t get brain damage if you don’t wave that rattle in front of his face the whole time he’s awake. All they need is you and some love and TLC…

One Child:
If anyone’s older kid gets near your baby you freak out! Don’t get so close!!

Four Children
:
You lay the baby on the ground and all his siblings migrate over immediately (it’s seriously like the baby is magnetized!), and you’re happy to see that they love their baby brother so much! Other kids touching the baby? No problem. He gets much worse at home!

One Child:
GERMS!! Must sterilize everything! No dirt! No going outside!

Four Children
:
Germs? Bring ‘em on! This kid needs a good immune system!

One Child
:
I never get any sleep! I’m going crazy!!!!

Four Children:
Wow. If only I realized how good I had it when I only had ONE kid waking me up in the middle of the night!

One Child:
You’re wondering how best to discipline your child, and every book/magazine you read says something different…What do you do???

Four Children
:
Realize it’s all about example and love—hang what every book and magazine has to say.

One Child:
You freak out when the baby gets more mobile and starts making messes (this does continue through to the second child, and sometimes even on to the third…) All you can think about is how much time this is going to take YOU to clean up…

Four Children
:
What, you poured out all the flour to make some bread for me? How sweet of you! You took all your blankets and sheets off your bed and stuffed them in the bathtub then hauled your mattress over to use as a slide? How creative!

One Child:
You feel stuck. You feel like you just can’t go anywhere because of the baby and your ‘schedule’ (what schedule, really?) The baby would start to fuss and you’d have to feed him or something would happen and you just don’t know how you’d handle it.

Four Children
:
We are NOT staying inside a minute longer! Bring the diaper bag, strap on the baby and load the others into the jogging stroller! We’re going for a walk or to play at a friend’s or SOMEWHERE!!! Let’s just GO!!!

No comments:

Post a Comment