First Day!!

The official First Day of School picture:



Josh on his very first 'bus' ride to school! He is ecstatic!!!! :)


So, as you can see, Josh has started school! My little baby! I've been wondering about all the reasons why I've been so nervous and upset about Josh starting school. Here are a few that I'd like to share:

I had always thought that the reason I was dreading school for Josh was that I felt that I was giving up on him. Like I was admitting that I just couldn't cut the whole homeschool thing. I felt that letting him go to school was saying that I didn't want to have him home with me anymore, which, of course, isn't at all true. But what I discovered as I sat and pondered over this problem--trying to sift through all the guilt and sadness--I realized that that definitely wasn't all of it! It may not even have been the reason for the crazy feelings at all. My biggest concern, I found, was the new life dynamic. For the past 6+ years, I've been a stay at home mom with little babies. We did whatever we wanted whenever we wanted without worrying about too many schedules and hardly any conflicts. It was a laid back time--not without its stresses, of course, but very different than the school days. So, my stress turned out to be a mixture of missing my big boy, but mostly grieving for the end of that 'quiet' time with just me and my babies. Life will be different now. The time for school has started and with that comes juggling many schedules, after school activities, lunches, homework, play dates, weekend getaways...all the things that come with the start of the school schedule. And now that it's here, there's really no turning back. Josh was made to go to school. We enjoyed our homeschool time together for the past 3 years, and I think I've prepared him very well mentally, but he is VERY ready for school. I suppose I've just been preparing myself for that change of tempo in our house that will come with this. I know, as well, that with that hectic school schedule time will fly even faster! And here I am, holding on with both hands to what I still have here at home. As flustered as I can get trying to teach and train the little ones, I will miss it TERRIBLY when it's done! I'm beginning, once again, to see the method in what my mother did and said when I was young...SORRY, MOM!! :) I will miss the days of no real schedule and lots of play time. Life has taken us up a notch. And, as is always true: The one constant in life is CHANGE!! And it's not always a bad thing.